Two More Short Lists, Based on Events in the News
Reasons for the Crowd’s Celebration Upon Receiving News of Scott Peterson’s Death Sentence
- They love justice. No, they loooooooooove it.
- Mistakenly thought they were at a monster truck rally and the Ku Klux Krusher was about to take on Multiculturizer II.
- They were really angry about Scott Peterson’s lack of public apology for crime he has steadfastly denied committing for past two years.
- Those were hoots ‘n’ hollers of profound sympathy for the victims’ family.
- Convinced Laci really would’ve liked them, and possibly even made out with them, if she’d only had the chance
- U.S.A.! U.S.A.!
Names for the New Washington D.C. Baseball Stadium Which I Would Gladly Finance After Winning the Lottery
- Armpit of America Field
- The Die Ralph Nader Complex
- Yankees Suck Stadium
- Where's Osama Field
- Ronald Reagan What-Now?
- Kid Who Always Got Picked Last Stadium
- George W. Bush is an Ignorant Election-Stealing Millionaire Jackass who Never Worked a Day in his Life and Should Never Have Won One Term Let Alone Two You Stupid Idiotic Rednecks Field
- Ian’s Enormous Manhood Park
- Youppi Memorial Stadium
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