Friday, June 29, 2007

Junkin' and Cleavin' and Offspringin' (and Wuladdin')

Did you like how I announced the resurrection of WULAD and then proceeded to disappear for a month? I thought you would. It was my way of separating the true fans from those who only visit the site because of my star turn on 3-2-1 Contact. You know who you are.

What actually happened was that Junkiness began winding down, as we've been unable to find and keep our target audience--or more accurately, we found our target audience, but it just happened to be celebrity crotch-shot masturbators with no discernible sense of humor. So we were somewhat busy scraping together last-ditch efforts to go out with an offensive bang.

Nothing's finalized as of yet, and the site is still technically active (I wrote a moving tribute to the impending Spice Girls reunion just yesterday), but as that project was winding down, another has wound up--as of a few weeks ago, I've joined the staff of Offsprung, a blog "for parents who don't suck," which was founded by the talented writers Neal Pollack, a.k.a. "Alternadad" (who I've been "appreciating" for years) and Matt Tobey, who's been one of my cohorts at Junkiness and is an excellent lay.

"What's this?" you say, "a parenting blog? But you yourself are no paterfamilias, silly WULAD!" And you'd be right. But as I pointed out to readers there, I have had parents, and was once a child.

[Which reminds me of a story: C-Baby and I were talking about Bruce Springsteen for some reason, and she asked, "Don't you remember how he was such a big thing in the early 80s, and was on the cover of 'Newsweek' and stuff?" and I replied, "No, I didn't read 'Newsweek.' I was a child."]

Anyway, Matt and I and Katie Spence write for an Offsprung sub-blog called The Cleaver (named for Ward, I believe), which has a similar tone to Junkiness, but with a focus on parenting and family-related stories. It doesn't sound like it'd be funny, but believe me, it is. So whether you have some little buggers of your own, or just enjoy decent writing and extreme close-ups of Christina Aguilera's uterus, come on by.

Meanwhile, I have every intention of continuing the process of rebuilding the WULAD empire, one post at a time. (Did I mention I'm not really a writer? God bless crystal meth!)