Still More Top Excuses for Not Updating Blog
...as published in Ye Olde Medieval Tech News and Witchcraft Gazette, February 9, 1204 A.D.:
- Distracted by bare ankle of Lady Janette during stake-burning halftime show of ScourgeBowl ‘04
- Just flew in from a catapult in Saxony, and man, are my arms tired
- Locked self in the bathroom all day with my copy of Liber augmenti et diminutionis vacatus numeratio divinationis, if you know what I mean
- Convinced that blogs were created by our sworn enemies the Normans to steal our attention while they plunder our townships and teach our womenfolk how to read
- Beginning to think I shouldn’t have made out with that leper chick at the office party
- Tired of making cheap jokes at the expense of the heathen Chinese, and their silly “Great Wall” and “gunpowder”
- Bandwidth is for shit ever since Royal Telecom of His Majesty Richard I merged with Aquitaine Online
- Ideas not coming so easily after having evil headache spirits drilled out of skull
- My days of blasphemy are over, as I promised some Pope while I was on the rack
- Concerned about vulnerability to worms in Windows 1200 and my infected leg wound
- Heart not in it ever since Thomas รก Becket bit the big one
- Was up late with the pogroms and whatnot
- Tired of making cheap jokes at the expense of the heathen Arabs, and their ridiculous “libraries” and “spherical trigonometry”
- Computer made of hay, pitch, and stone surprisingly ineffective
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