Wrapped Up Like A Douche

Speed-Blogging Made Easy!™ presents the Hastily-Compiled yet Entertaining:

Favorite Examples Utilizing the Phrase, “On the Business End of...”

• “In Season Two, Mason found himself on the business end of a haz-mat accident and spent a dozen episodes slowly succumbing to radiation poisoning—and gaining a soul in the process.”
  
  
• "Indeed, whether streaming gallantly atop the electrified razorwire ramparts of a 1940's Japanese internment camp, or emblazoned on the business end of a guided missile plunging majestically through the roof of a suspicious Arabic preschool, Old Glory represents all that is infallible about our exquisite Christian nation."
  
  
• "Perhaps cursed by the first three letters of its name, Baden found itself on the business end of a double-digit lead by Cal just minutes into the game, which soon turned into a 33-point blowout."
  
  
• "Sitting strapped onto a traditional one-legged milking stool, the tennis player took a grip on the business end of a bovine for the first time in his life."
  
  
• "The problem was, I twisted my ankle and ended up on the business end of a most-unwelcome attempted rape. I had to tell the poor dear that there was no room left in my large and unwieldy a$$, as there was already some state government and city council members with their perspective members deep inside."
  
  
• "Over and over, the archetype again finds herself on the business end of a phallic lens, made up as the perpetual mystery woman-child at the behest of a director who behaves like a cross between post-Marxist private dick and invalid father."
  
  
• "Goku rushes to confront Baby, but soon finds himself on the business end of a deadly assault! Is it true? Can Goku be gone forever?!"
  
  
• "If you mouth off to the leader of the Sand People, you will find yourself on the business end of a gaffi stick... and say goodbye to any branching subquests you might have gotten by being polite to the man."
  
  
• "Rayman’s tireless quest to defend the World from evil in all its dastardly forms continues against the Hoodlums, a fanatical army that would like nothing more than to see Rayman on the business end of a Hoodmonger’s Boomstick rifle."
  
  
• "Bino was thrown to the ground for his efforts, and ended up on the business end of a picture perfect Johnson split legged moonsault."
  
  
• "Put it on the business end of a 150-tondrill and it'll rack up a lot of feet and Mesabi and Marquette Range taconites preparatory to drilling."
  
  
• "As the flaming priest stepped into the firing line/On the business end of a beam of despair/God, he took his own life/During the coming of the/(Black Shuck!) Black Shuck!"

Want more? Knock yourself out.