Are You Ready for Some Update-Ball?!

Since readers have been stopping by to say hello and ask where the fuck I am, I thought I'd offer a little update. Most of my energy has been going to writing for Junkiness, since we have a stable of five awesometastic contributors and a quota of eight posts per day (upon pain of genital electrocution). It's not quite as free-form as WULAD, but I appreciate the team spirit (our mascot is "The Fighting Black Jesuses") and the approximately 2,000 additional visitors per day beyond the highest number this site ever had, even in the heady days of the Britney Bajingo-Baring insanity of late 2006.

So the easiest way for you to get your WULAD fix is to read Junkiness on a daily basis, with the knowledge that approximately one-fifth to one-third (depending on the day) of the genius there flowed from my mighty keyboard. If you're interested in more specific information on who wrote what, you can subscribe to the site's RSS feed, which includes author tags—but since the collaborative spirit is the best part of the thing, you should of course read everyone else's wicked-brilliant posts.

Finally, just to prove that I've been hard at work hammering the molten metal of news and gossip into the finely-honed steel of satire, here's an author's-choice fistful of what I consider my recent greatest hits over there:

• Paris Hilton, Goodwill Ambassador
  
• An Inconvenient Sleuth
  
• Obama: "Vote for Me or I’ll Jack You with This Crowbar"
  
• Hey Pot, It’s Kettle—You’re a Pedophile!
  
• State of the Union 2007: The Junkiness Edition
  
• Burn, Baby Burn—Geothermal Inferno!
  
• Breaking News: Spears Family Circus Stalls at Three
  
• The Candidate of a Thousand Faces
  
• Yes, Virginia, There is a Racist Clause

... Those ought to keep you busy for a while, or my name isn't naked Harry Potter. Anyway, posting here at WULAD will be on a once-in-a-blue-moon basis for the foreseeable future, so be sure to subscribe to the strange and wonderful WULAD RSS feed (and if you subscribed prior to a few months ago, you'll need to resubscribe—details here) so you won't miss a damn word. So until we meet again: Godspeed, you black Jesuses!

P.S. I almost forgot—there's one more reader-contributed installment of The Bible II in the can, so I will be presenting that next week for your religious education and holy enjoyment.

P.P.S. Happy Ground Hog Day!